The Rug Doctor

Yes I agree with Little Dee. What has happened to everyone's blogs over the last couple of weeks? Busy - seems to be the answer for me! So as I catch my breath for a few moments, I will recall a little revelation.

There's a song we sing sometimes which I've battled to agree with. Some of the words go like this:

Lead me to the cross
Where Your love poured out
Bring me to my knees
Lord I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to You
Lord lead me, lead me to the cross

A very heavy mouthful to sing. The line which hit me hard was 'rid me of myself'. I keep thinking "now that can't be right! Why would I want You to rid me of who I am." But now I realise that's not what the line is saying.

Let me explain.

I enter a home once a week. The people who live there have the most amazing rugs throughout their home, and I've come to notice that they are all from the same set. Same colours and patterns, just different sizes.

There's one that greets you as you come through the front door. It travels over the first set of stairs. It is bright red and very beautiful (I vacuum this rug on a regular basis - it hears my singing!)

Then there is a shorter version of the same rug stretched out over the lounge floor. It is terribly faded as is the big square rug underneath the dining room table and the tiny rug in one of the bedrooms. They have faded to a light red, slightly pinkish colour and even though the patterns and markings are still there, they have no vibrance quite like the first rug.

Why are they faded? It's because the afternoon sun hits them everyday, and has done so for many many years. Meanwhile the bold red rug lies in a dark hallway in perfect condition.

I've been considering 'the cost' over the last month. And while thinking back on those words 'rid me of myself' it has been a fear of mine that if I truly surrendered my whole self to God, that me, Nina, would be lost somewhere in this heart transformation (some of you reading this might just think that my brain is warped for thinking this - you are right).

So when visiting this home mentioned above, God broke through this thought with the basic illustration of these rugs. The rug left in the dark will always be it's true self. Bold in colour, glorious to look at, but it remains in the dark. The other rugs who are faded and pale have the mark of the sun on them, and while they have lost some of their colour, their greatest feature now is the fact that they have been hit by the sun and it has changed them.

Do you get where I am going with this? When you walk in the light as He is in the light, you will change because you carry the mark of the Son. His affect on you will be evident. Have you lost who you are because of this? No. Has God rid you of yourself? No. He has simply covered you with Himself and the world now sees more of Him and less of you (which as Christians this is our aim right?)

To be more Christlike should be every Christians main goal in life. Counting the cost and all of it's surrendering will not kill you (just all the bad stuff that comes along with you).

To me those faded rugs now seem more precious then the one left alone in the dark. There seems to be more life in those faded rugs, more depth to their character, more of a story to tell. And I want my life to be like that for God. I want Him to write His name all over me with a permanent vivid! I want Him to overshadow my character so much that I don't resemble me, but Him. I'm still me, but as John the baptist said, "I must decrease, so that He may increase."

So rid me of myself, I belong to You.
Lead me to the cross.